Mental
Health Association in New York State, Inc. |
Community Connections, Winter 2002/2003Aftermath
– A School Discussion In the spring of 2002 the Mental Health Association was asked to participate in a discussion that included about 80 participants following the death of a student by suicide in a local high school. Participants of the discussion included parents, teachers, students, interested community members and Thomas T. Frantz Ph D, Dean of Education, Counseling and Psychology Graduate School at the University of Buffalo. Dr. Frantz has been very helpful and involved with grieving parents for over a 20-year period. A panel of students was asked to share their experiences with attempting suicide or having a best friend who committed suicide. Students were brutally honest about the fact they would not go to their parents to discuss thoughts of suicide. Parents were shocked to hear the statement that students would not confide in their parents when deeply troubled. One mother is the audience asked, “Why would you not go to your parents?” Students replied in agreement that they “did not want to cause their parents to be upset”. Students did say they would talk to a trusted close friend or a specific teacher. Students also expressed dislike and strong reluctance to go for professional counseling. One teenage girl, hospitalized twice for suicide attempts, stated a family breakup as the reason for her attempts. A young man became very emotional when he spoke of his inability to verbalize his pain. The meeting ended with a better understanding by parents of the difficulties children have in communicating emotional pain to parents. The question remains, how can a parent help a child when the child cannot tell the parent about the pain he or she is experiencing? There are warning signs and triggers that are apparent after a completed suicide. Looking for those triggers and warning signs may prevent another suicide. posted 1/28/03 |